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The Full Boof
BREAKING: DEA UNVEILS NEW “RED PILL OR BLUE PILL” RESCHEDULING PORTAL — INDUSTRY CHOOSES MASS PANIC
Congratulations, medical cannabis industry, the DEA just dropped its brand-new Schedule III registration portal, and it’s basically The Matrix if The Matrix was designed by a committee of humorless federal interns who’ve never inhaled anything stronger than printer fumes.
This is the paperwork equivalent of being offered two pills by a man in a leather trench coat, except the stakes are way higher and the lighting is worse. Let’s break it down.
2 days ago2 min read
Cannabis CEO “Shocked and Confused” After Sliding Into 87 LinkedIn DMs and Not Getting Laid Once
A cannabis industry CEO confirmed this week that his bold strategy of sliding into women’s LinkedIn direct messages has produced exactly zero romantic outcomes, leaving the executive both confused and mildly offended.
Mar 52 min read
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