The Full Boof

New York’s cannabis regulators admitted they’ve been measuring the school buffer wrong for three years — now 152 operators face shutdowns, a $15M fund skips existing stores, and compliance has devolved into spreadsheets, lawsuits, and Form 6399-FU.

A federal court just ruled New York’s “social equity” weed licenses unconstitutional. Turns out, excluding 49 states isn’t reform — it’s just illegal.

The Omaha Tribe legalized cannabis before Nebraska even picked a lane. They wrote the law, built the system, and started issuing licenses—proving that tribal sovereignty is faster than state bullshit.

Montana merged its weed and booze regulators. Now bar owners think they can sell joints, dispensaries are advertising bourbon, and no one knows who's actually in charge. This isn’t reform — it’s a licensing disaster dressed up as efficiency.

JEFFERSON CITY, MO  — In a groundbreaking move to confuse, entrap, and mildly inconvenience cannabis operators statewide, Missouri...

State regulators unveil bold new strategy to make legal weed just shitty enough to lose to the plug again. Welcome to “safety.” FOR...

Texas Governor Greg Abbott Receives Prestigious “Accidental Cannabis Hero” Award After Vetoing THC Ban He Clearly Didn’t Understand In a...

In a bold new commitment to scientific illiteracy, California regulators unveil a pesticide policy that would decertify testing labs...

If you’ve ever run craps out of a basement while high, congratulations—you’re now eligible for a Vegas weed casino license. LAS VEGAS, NV...

ATCC raids weed shops for not having licenses. Weed shops shocked to learn they needed one. BALTIMORE, MD —  In a bold show of...

State Officials Celebrate Historic Labor Win by Taking Credit and Leaving Early SALT LAKE CITY, UT —  In a stunning act of legal...

Missouri Accidentally Conducts Controlled Study on How to Kill a Cannabis Market Before It Starts Jefferson City, MO – In a bold...

Finally, a Dispensary That Feels Like Jury Duty HARRISBURG, PA — In a bold attempt to modernize cannabis sales using 1970s government...

Rewarding snitching with store credit—brought to you by people who’ve never been to a sesh. NEW YORK, NY —  In an inspired moment of...

Where ‘Transparency’ Means ‘We Livestreamed the Grift’ FRANKFORT, KY —  If you recently lost out on a Kentucky medical cannabis license,...

Test Results May Vary—But Only Upward. HARTFORD, CT —  In an inspiring display of blind optimism and spreadsheet-based licensing, the...

In a bold regulatory move, officials confirm THC is only safe when delivered via neon bears, sour worms, or chewy dismembered...

It’s not summer in Missouri until the admin hold hits and your whole supply chain gets ghosted by the state. Jefferson City, MO  — As the...

Wearing his branded fleece and a thousand-yard stare, the exec rang up Delta-8 and mushroom gummies for seven hours before realizing the...

Officials blamed the error on a “clerical oversight,” though witnesses say the dog made three successful deliveries, applied for a loan,...