HIGH TIMES HOSTAGE SITUATION: RAW CEO EXPLODES AT ANY MENTION OF ‘BOOF DU JOUR’ AS STAFF ARE FORCED TO EAT PAPERS IN FRONT OF THE BOARD

By Boof du Jour - The Only Publication Josh Can’t Roll Up and Smoke

The resurrection of High Times was supposed to be wholesome. A comeback story. A phoenix rising from 30 years of unpaid invoices and whatever that Reg A scam fever dream was supposed to be.

Instead, the once-iconic brand has reportedly devolved into a workplace so unstable it makes Vice look like a Fortune 500 development camp.

Sources inside the RAW-powered High Times reboot describe an atmosphere best summarized as:

“Imagine Willy Wonka bought a failing magazine and immediately turned it into a hostage situation.”

THE PETITION THEY PRETEND NEVER HAPPENED

Back in the halcyon days of 2024–2025, before the bankruptcy auctions, before the receivership, before the Cannabis Cup finally admitted it was basically a Pepsi Challenge with weed, Boof du Jour launched a completely legitimate, absolutely professional petition:

LET BOOF DU JOUR RUN HIGH TIMES. 

Because somebody should clean up the mess, and we already own the mop.

Thousands (fine, dozens) supported it. But RAW’s head honcho Josh Kesselman allegedly treated it like we were trying to unionize his rolling papers.

Staff say the mere suggestion that maybe the hottest satirical outlet in cannabis could breathe life into the fossilized remains of High Times sends Josh into a cosmic rage spiral.

MENTION “BOOF DU JOUR” AND WATCH THE ROOM DETONATE

According to multiple insiders who spoke to us from private burner accounts titled things like “DefinitelyNotHBIEmployee”, bringing up Boof du Jour inside the building is now considered a

Category 5 HR event.

One staffer claimed:

“We said ‘Boof’ once and Josh appeared behind us like Bloody Mary. Nobody even knows how he got in the room.”

Another said:

“He treats Boof like Voldemort. Except Voldemort had more chill.”

THE ALLEGED RAW PAPER HAZING RITUAL:

Here’s where the circus becomes performance art.

Several sources, and one extremely traumatized intern, allege that whenever someone even whispers “Boof du Jour,” Josh forces them to eat a full pack of RAW Classic Kingsize Slims in front of the board as proof of loyalty.

Not figuratively. 

Not metaphorically. 

Not “brand immersion.”

We’re talking straight cellulose tapas, baby.

Eyewitness accounts paint the scene with the kind of dystopian dread you normally only get at SXSW brand activations:

“He slammed the papers on the table and said,

‘If Boof thinks they can run High Times, show me YOU can run High Times WITHOUT BOOF.’

Then he made Mark from Ad Ops chew through 32 sheets like a goat trying to pass compliance.”

Another insider added:

“He kept yelling, ‘THE MAGAZINE IS MINE! THE NARRATIVE IS MINE! THE ONLY SATIRE ALLOWED HERE IS UNINTENTIONAL!’”

A third source, who has since fled to a CBD pet-treat startup, said:

“Board meetings look like a hostage video sponsored by a rolling paper company.”

HIGH TIMES INTERNALS: A BEAUTIFUL TRAINWRECK

Outside the paper-eating hazing ritual, the vibes internally are described as:

• “A newsroom held together by hemp twine and stress.”

• “Print magazine energy with AOL dial-up infrastructure.”

• “A brand reboot powered entirely by denial and cone tips.”

Departments reportedly change direction hourly. The editorial team is trying to do journalism while juggling incense diffusers. The events team hasn’t slept since 2017.

Meanwhile, RAW gets to operate like the benevolent savior of the brand while allegedly running a corporate environment that feels like:

“Succession, but everyone’s microdosing and the boardroom is made of unbleached hemp fibers.”

THE TRUTH THEY CAN’T SWALLOW (BUT THEIR STAFF CAN)

Here’s the thing Josh won’t say out loud:

Boof du Jour is the only outlet bold enough, deranged enough, and petty enough to restore High Times to cultural relevance.

Not with nostalgia. 

Not with press releases. 

Not with “we’re returning to our roots” kumbaya speeches.

But with actual edge. 

Actual truth. 

Actual satire with fangs.

Yet instead of embracing that, we allegedly have executives forcing employees to carbo-load their own paper stock to prove some kind of weird dominance ritual straight out of a 1970s cult documentary.

SO WHAT NOW?

Boof du Jour extends a heartfelt, professional invitation:

Josh, stop making your employees eat rolling papers and let the real chaos agents fix your magazine.

Give us one issue. One cover. One month in the driver’s seat.

Worst case: You go viral. Best case: High Times stops feeling like an estate sale with a URL.

Call us.

 Or don’t - we’ll write about it either way.