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The Full Boof


The Chris Peterson Invitational: Muha Meds’ Big, Beautiful, Stupid Alibi
A Michigan dispensary got caught giving away nearly 2,000 grams of concentrate under a fake name — so in a last-ditch PR stunt straight out of a fever dream, they hosted a statewide gathering of every real Chris Peterson they could find. It didn’t prove innocence, but it did prove how far the cannabis industry will go to avoid admitting it screwed up.
Nov 154 min read


Hemp’s Last Stand: Congress Accidentally Nukes a Whole Industry Because They Don’t Know What the Hell a Cannabinoid Is
Congress didn’t tighten hemp rules — they accidentally carpet-bombed the entire industry. With one sloppy amendment, they killed Delta-8, THCA, minor cannabinoids, and most CBD products. Boof du Jour breaks down the federal panic attack that turned hemp into contraband overnight.
Nov 144 min read


Civil RICO for Dummies: How a Supreme Court Case Just Made Every CBD Brand a Crime Family
The Supreme Court just made the hemp industry’s worst nightmare come true: mislabeling “THC-Free” can now count as racketeering. Boof du Jour breaks down how a mislabeled bottle turned every CBD brand into a crime syndicate with better stationery.
Nov 43 min read


Eaze 2.0: From Billion-Dollar Hype to Haight Street Hospice
Eaze was once the “Uber of weed.” After bankruptcy and a fire sale, the brand has reappeared in San Francisco’s Haight-Ashbury. But the comeback feels less like a rebirth and more like a hospice wing for a unicorn that investors already buried.
Sep 245 min read


Too Broke to Tax: California’s Cannabis Market Gets a “Break”
California cut its cannabis excise tax from 19% to 15%, a supposed lifeline for a $4B market already on life support. Will this revive legal weed—or just delay the obituary?
Sep 223 min read


Massachusetts CCC Welcomes Back, Then Immediately Benches, Its Chair
After a court ruled her firing unlawful, Shannon O’Brien was reinstated as CCC Chair — only to be suspended again on appeal. Massachusetts cannabis regulation has officially turned into compliance theater with billion-dollar stakes.
Sep 122 min read


Massachusetts Wants to Cancel Weed: $1.6 Billion on the Ballot
Massachusetts just certified a ballot petition to nuke its $1.6B adult-use cannabis industry. If it makes the ballot, every dispensary, cultivator, and brand in the state could be gone overnight. Welcome to the dumbest economic experiment since prohibition.
Sep 83 min read


NY’s Proximity Correction Update Now Live: Press F to Relocate
New York’s cannabis regulators admitted they’ve been measuring the school buffer wrong for three years — now 152 operators face shutdowns, a $15M fund skips existing stores, and compliance has devolved into spreadsheets, lawsuits, and Form 6399-FU.
Aug 283 min read


Trulieve Declares Victory, Retreats From Battlefield With 40% Casualties
Trulieve calls it “pruning to bloom.” The reality? Exiting California, Massachusetts, and Nevada while bragging about 725,000 loyalty members — and still ignoring the death of Lorna McMurrey. Our exposé uncovers regulator silence, financial spin, and a company pivoting straight into a mountain.
Aug 273 min read


DRY‑LABGED & PROBATIONED: ASSURED TESTING’S REINSTATEMENT ISN’T REFORM — IT’S A RIGGED COMEBACK
Assured Testing Labs buried 7,000+ contaminated samples, got caught, paid $300K, and now they’re back — with biweekly check-ins and a PR audit team. Trust the system? Hell no. This isn’t oversight. It’s regulatory damage control.
Aug 252 min read


NEW YORK’S SOCIAL EQUITY LICENSES JUST GOT DEPORTED
A federal court just ruled New York’s “social equity” weed licenses unconstitutional. Turns out, excluding 49 states isn’t reform — it’s just illegal.
Aug 203 min read


The Federal Cannabis Throuple Just Added a Fourth — and It’s Trump
Trump mentioned weed. The agencies are still broken. And now the federal cannabis strategy is a four-way clusterfuck with no safe word. Rescheduling is the headline — but the chaos behind it is where the real story lives.
Aug 143 min read


TRAPCAM™: The First Surveillance Camera That Auto-Deletes Footage When It Detects a Cop
TrapCam™ claims to protect cannabis businesses—by deleting security footage if cops show up. It’s not compliance. It’s obstruction, sold as innovation.
Aug 134 min read


NEW YORK’S $1.5B SEED-TO-SALE SYSTEM IS NOW JUST A FANCY DOWNLOAD SCREEN
New York’s $1.5B cannabis market is now monitored by a login screen no one can access — thanks to vendor chaos, OCM delays, and the Track-and-Trace Grift Economy™.
Aug 123 min read


Thailand’s Cannabis Laws Are So Confusing, We’re Starting to Think They're Just Finishing the Sentence of a Guy Who Stutters
We hit the streets of Bangkok to investigate Thailand’s cannabis policy nightmare. The laws change weekly, the ministers are stoned, and the tourists have no idea what they’ve walked into. It’s like getting high in the middle of a bureaucratic improv class.
Aug 64 min read


NEBRASKA AWARDS FIRST WEED LICENSE BY ACCIDENT — TRIBE LEGALIZES ITSELF
The Omaha Tribe legalized cannabis before Nebraska even picked a lane. They wrote the law, built the system, and started issuing licenses—proving that tribal sovereignty is faster than state bullshit.
Aug 53 min read


The Yearly Weed Divorce Clause: Congress Extends Cannabis Protections Like a Bad Ex Who Won’t Move Out
Another fiscal year, another bullshit promise. Congress extends cannabis protections again—without real reform, without commitment, and without shame. Welcome to the Yearly Weed Divorce Clause.
Jul 303 min read


MAY THE ODDS BE EVER IN YOUR ZIP CODE: New York’s Proximity Correction Notice Sparks Cannabis Hunger Games
New York approved over 150 dispensaries too close to schools. Now they’re making licensees fight for survival in a real-world cannabis Hunger Games. This Field Dispatch goes inside the madness — Tributes, districts, and all.
Jul 294 min read


MONTANA BARS START SELLING WEED AFTER MISUNDERSTANDING GOVERNMENT MERGER
Montana merged its weed and booze regulators. Now bar owners think they can sell joints, dispensaries are advertising bourbon, and no one knows who's actually in charge. This isn’t reform — it’s a licensing disaster dressed up as efficiency.
Jul 283 min read


Germany’s Cannabis Future: Bureaucracy, Blunt Trauma, and Bundesboof
Germany’s weed rollout is what happens when bureaucrats get high on paperwork and paranoia. No dispensaries, no fun — just clubs, quotas, and confusion. We break down why Europe’s cannabis dream looks a lot like an American MSO’s bankruptcy hearing.
Jul 183 min read
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