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The Full Boof
EX-GROWERS OF GREED: How Michigan Dispensary Timber Cannabis Fucked Their Own Workers
Timber Cannabis , the Michigan-born dispensary brand that looks like a co-working space, just settled a $205,000 lawsuit for wage...
Jun 173 min read
POLICY MALPRACTICE: INSIDE ARIZONA’S MOLDY WEED SCANDAL AND THE STATE AGENCY THAT JUST WATCHED
By Boof du Jour’s Investigative Desk (and black mold sample unit) Arizona’s cannabis testing system is broken. Not bureaucratic. Not...
Jun 123 min read
La Mota’s House of Cards: Oregon’s Favorite Cannabis Chain Can’t Stop Not Paying People
By Boof du Jour Investigations Unit PORTLAND, OR — In Oregon’s booming cannabis sector, where “compliance” means remembering to unlock...
Jun 43 min read
AUSTRALIA'S CANNABIS TELEHEALTH CIRCUS: Inside the Startup That Gave 12,000 People Weed—With Less Oversight Than a Toaster Warranty
By Boof du Jour Global Field Team SYDNEY, AUSTRALIA — In a country where you still can’t legally buy a fucking vape with nicotine, a...
May 233 min read
$2M Anti-Aging Freak vs. Chuck from Enterprise—Who’s Actually Healthier?
In the world’s most unnecessary health showdown, we put Bryan Johnson—tech millionaire, human lab rat, and walking Neutrogena ad—head-to-head with Chuck—a 34-year-old assistant manager at Enterprise Car Rental who eats gas station sushi and owns exactly one towel.
May 222 min read
Puffcon 2025 Has Evolved Into a Giant Customer Support Center With Live DJs
If you've never seen a man openly weep while cradling a dab rig in 90-degree heat, you’ve never been to Puffcon 2025. What was once billed as a futuristic stoner utopia has now fully transitioned into a glorified vape exchange pop-up — part tech support summit, part Burning Man for broken electronics, and entirely unhinged.
May 213 min read
CBD, Lies, and RICO Charges: Medical Marijuana Inc. May Have Just Snorted the First Domino
By the Boof du Jour Investigative Division, Pissed Off and Fully Medicated SAN DIEGO, CA — It’s a tale as old as weed: slap a label on...
May 164 min read
SPOILED FLOWER & CORPORATE FUNGUS: CURALEAF’S LATEST MEDICAL WEED RECALL SMELLS EXACTLY HOW IT SHOULD
By Boof du Jour Investigative Team Filed from Connecticut, where even the medical weed now comes with an expiration date and a wellness...
May 143 min read
Steve D’Angelo’s High Orbit: How the Face of Cannabis Justice Burned the Bridge to the People He Claimed to Save
Moon-wrapped marketing, zero prisoners freed, and a legacy of corporate compliance that helped destroy California’s outdoor cannabis...
May 84 min read
THE PERKINELMER PIPE DREAM: Inside the $300 Million Clusterfuck That Made Labs Lie and Investors Cry
By Boof du Jour Investigations May 2025 – This article was fact-checked by no one because the truth is already worse than fiction. When...
May 54 min read
The Influencer Apocalypse: Washed-Up Weed Stars Convert a Dead Mall Into a Trap House, Get Raided Like It’s 2008
SEATTLE, WA — In a bold experiment in professional delusion and THC-induced dementia, a cast of washed-up cannabis influencers—led by...
Apr 296 min read
From Toddlers to Terpenes: Michael Halow and the Missouri Microbusiness Meat Wagon
By Boof du Jour Investigations Desk “Empowering communities, one back-alley handshake at a time.” ST. LOUIS, MO — In the twisted,...
Apr 294 min read
Cannabis Companies Raise Prices Citing Tariffs, Musk Tweets, and Mercury in Gatorade
By Boof du Jour Staff Inflation-choked, terp-deprived, and financially abused In an industry where a stale eighth already costs more...
Apr 294 min read
The Maineframe Scandal: How Wellness Connection Turned a Regulatory Office Into Their Side Hustle
By Boof du Jour Investigative Bureau April 2025 In the great pantheon of cannabis corruption, where stolen licenses, fake equity...
Apr 294 min read
THC Seltzer Hype Exposed: Thousands of iPhones Found in Cartel-Run LinkedIn Pharming Operation
By the Boof du Jour Investigative Team BROOKLYN — In what authorities are calling “the dumbest fucking scandal to ever involve...
Apr 295 min read
Vladimir Putin Named Chairman of the Board at Curaleaf in Shock Industry Takeover
By the Boof du Jour Investigative Team WAKEFIELD, MA — In a move so batshit insane it somehow still makes more sense than Curaleaf’s...
Apr 295 min read
High Times Intellectual Property Up for Sale, Opening Bids Start at “Whatever You Got on You”
By the Boof du Jour Investigative Team LOS ANGELES — After decades spent riding the cultural coattails of a plant they never actually...
Apr 295 min read
Monopoly Melts Promises to Bridge the Legacy Market — By Keeping One Foot Firmly in the Black Market
By the Boof du Jour Investigative Team LOS ANGELES — In a stunning display of self-awareness wrapped in pure fucking delusion, California...
Apr 295 min read
MJBizCon Announces Complete Rebrand to CocaineBizCon After Finally Accepting Who Their Audience Is
By Boof du Jour Investigative Team LAS VEGAS — After years of pretending to care about cannabis, MJBizCon finally did what everyone in...
Apr 294 min read
NECANN to Host Over 400 Cannabis Brands, 390 of Which Will Be Gone by Next Year
By the Boof du Jour Investigative Team BOSTON — The Northeast Cannabis Convention (NECANN), best known for stuffing more overpriced weed...
Apr 294 min read
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